Thursday, 22 September 2011

Interesting Chocolates With a Sprinkle of Cynicism

I have discovered the secret to an interesting blogger or diarist. The key is to lead an interesting life. This I will proceed to attempt, solely for the purpose of becoming a more interesting blogger. This will gain me followers, which will raise my self-esteem, thereby helping me achieve a completely unworthy and useless goal, pushing me further toward the height of stable insanity. Ah, life, how I have missed thee.

Forrest Gump once said, "Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." He was quoting his mother, but let's not quibble. I'd like to agree, with an amendment of my own making: "Life is like a box of chocolates after the fat kid got to it. It smells nice, but the rattling you hear when you shake it are just the husks of long-consumed truffles and nougats, milks and darks. The wrapping is pretty, but the promise of hidden delight is stifled with horror when, upon opening, you see it was just the memory of something good. You never know what you're gonna get, because maybe, just maybe, the fat kid left a half-eaten Mars Bar behind. He didn't, but you can always pretend."

12 comments:

  1. I'm not quite sure if this is supposed to be a positive or negative thing! I applaud anyone who is daring enough to open the lid of the chocolate box and poke around in the wrappings to see if there's a strawberry cream lurking in there. Who knows, maybe the fat kids don't have all the fun :)


    I see from your profile that you are interested in Scotland! Have you checked out my blog yet?

    http://www.picturebritain.com/

    I’m working my way from the north of Great Britain to the south through pictures. You’ll see photographs of glorious vistas, charming close-ups, delicious recipes and interesting tidbits of life in Great Britain for the pleasure of Scotophiles everywhere!

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  2. Of course, Seth. Every day.

    Abby,

    It is neither in essence. Merely a satirical, and cynical, point of view so typical with me. Great Britain is wonderful, indeed.

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  3. Maybe the fat kid only likes coconut. ^_^

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  4. haha! This is great! Your first paragraph is quite thought provoking..at least for me! And the second..is really quite hilarious! Thank you for making me laugh!

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  5. Haha, you are quite welcome, Jenna. And thank you, m'lady. :D

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  6. You do realize you have now made me want chocolate!!! One thing about living with your aunt is that I have a fellow chocolate lover!!!

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  7. Haha, aw, such a shame. Well, I hope you find some. XD

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  8. I can just see everyone going around quoting your amendment. Maybe someday? ;)

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